From: s0_hooked Date: Jun-1 8:08 pm
my boyfriend and I will have been together 3 1/2 years this month ad my frustration level has hit its breaking point. I love him to death, as he does me...talk of marriage...yada yada. The only real relationship issue we have is the fact that we don't really talk our problems out...we just get angry and react. I've also been partially diagnosed as manic depressive (bipolar)...i say partially because it was a friend of the family doing a home evaluation, not an actual consultation...[point being i have extreme unexplainable mood swings]. ANYWAY, last night we got into an argument that probably could have been prevented but neither of us knows how to drop things;
My issue: He got up to go to class at 9. Supposed to end at 11:15, he pulled up @ 1:30. I kept my mouth shut. He went down the street to his dude's for [i'll say] an hour, came back...and he took me to Dots. Which I appreciate knowing how men (well anybody) hate shopping with me. That trip took about and hour and a half which puts us at 4 pm. Get home, he goes back down the street, even though we've both said we wanted to sit down kick it, do what we do. At 7:30 he comes back, 'ready' to chill. Watching a movie, 6 minutes into it...one of his friends comes and says lets go ridin around. He stops the movie and just...starts walkin out. No hi, bye, kiss my -ss, nothing. So I said "You're sickening, i hope u know that" and went up to the bedroom. He follows....an argument ensues....because
"I want him around 24/7 and i'm 'crying' about sh*t that don't need to be cried about and I can watch the movie without him". I said "Its not just about that, that ain't what I want". **shoulder shrug** "So"
and that just sent me over the top. "Well then f--- you and this relationship". And I started throwing open drawers....and it just escalated and he left, I left...
I honestly didnt mean to say it. I was so angry...beyond explanation...because it seems like he doesn't care about ANYTHING i say to him anymore...and for him to just say "so"...like he's writing me off...it hurt my feelings more than anything, i think.
He says that the reason he leaves (on a daily...[like 'i'll be right back' and i see him 4 hours later or at 4:30am]) is because I haven't done what he's asked me to do...which is control my mouth and watch how I talk to him, yet i try to explain to him that i'm usually not tryna be a *u kno what* intentionally...but thats "always an excuse".
so now i'm at my mothers and my mouth has gotten the best of me. Hes pissed because he's never threatened to leave or said screw the relationship...and i dont know what to say to him to make things right cuz no matter how i word things...i am always wrong. I'm either lying, sarcastic, sardonic, taunting him, or its just plain out irrelevant.
AM I really crazy for feeling pushed aside, etc? AM I just being childish? someone please tell me something cuz i'm damn near on the verge of a breakdown.
Dear: s0_Hooked, I think the best thing to do is one relax and breath... so you don't break down! I've been with my boyfriend for a little longer than you have and I have those days where it's not the greatest. I think all relationships have their ups and downs, so it's okay. You mention that you have extreme mood swings.. and your partially diagnosed with Bipolar. See the thing is there a lot of prescriptions out there that help you control mood swings as well. If this is an on going basis, maybe you should consult your doctor and see what he has to say about that. I think we both know that communication is the key to any relationship, marriage etc.. so the one thing I personally like to do is write my feelings and anger down on a piece a paper, or type it on the computer. Than I read it over and see how I really feel. Sometimes when I get into big arguments and they might look minor to other people but they do get out of hand. I say things and he says things that we both shouldn't...So.. what I do is when I'm really angry is that I write everything down until I'm calm and I can speak to him properly about how I feel. --The best thing is to talk it out, even if that means not talking for hours but atleast you and your boyfriend will be more calm in talking to each other. And please never ignore a problem at hand and just forget it like it never happened. ----TRUST ME IT WILL COME BACK IF IT IS NOT RESOLVED!! And being stubborn and not dropping a fight can be sometimes hard because most of us like to have the last word or be right about the situation-- but remember, apologizing, and realizing the situation at hand, makes you the better person in understanding your relationship. I definitely think that stopping the movie was wrong because he shouldve left it on either for you or watched it with you. That's plain wrong and thats something you need to talk to him about and tell him you don't like it. Sometimes it gets overwhelming because guys need their space and girls, when where in love we want them around like there is no tomorrow!! =) but its like reverse psychology, give him his space and leave him to do what he does and automatically when he sees you do things without him, he pays a lot more attention to you. It's okay if you didn't mean to say it. In a relationship it always happens! If you really feel that he doesn't care than you need to talk to him and ask him and work something out that both of you will be happy about.-- But in my opinion I believe he does care--- just sometimes gets upset at what's happening-- you know what I mean? If he keeps on saying, that you need to control you mouth and watch what you say-- Hmm try having recorder, and when you fight record everything than listen to it.... and see what you say when your fighting. Because many people don't realize what they say until the fight is over.. And listen, your not wrong and your not lying, being sarcastic, or taunting him. You are who you are, and sometimes things happen and you just need to be aware of your anger and surroundings and that's it. If someone does say those things to you, than maybe there not the right one. But your not crazy... things like this happen all the time in relationships, they just need to be talked out.. Hope that helps. xoxo- Sapna
From: Maverick
Help me!!!
Time: 9:14pm
Here's the deal. My boyfriend is in law school and we have a long distance relationship. We see each other every weekend. We have been dating for almost 2 years, and we talk about getting married often. Last December he told his mom he wanted to marry me. He had also told me that he was going to ask me by a certain time, but the money did not come through like had expected, therefore he could not buy a ring. So now it has been 2 month past the date he had said he would propose. I understood the money situation. We love each other's families, and we hardly ever fight. I am out of school and I am working. I am also 2 years older than he is. I had thought that he might work this summer to earn money for a ring; however, he has taken an unpaid internship. So obviously he does not plan on proposing anytime soon. He says he wants to marry me, but just not now. He told me this weekend that he is not ready for a family or ready to deal with getting engaged. I feel like something is a little different. So my question is... what does it mean when a guy says they want to marry you, but just not right now? Does he mean what he is saying or does it mean I am not really sure if I want to marry you? Should I wait for him to be ready? I am very confused. not sure what to do....
Dear: Maverick
I have a lot of friends who are also in this situation. They have boyfriends and many of them are in a long distance relationship. I understand how your feeling at the moment, probably really anxious and confused about how he's acting and what you should do. I think he is serious about you because guy's happen to be really close their moms. If this is the case with your guy, than there's nothing to worry about. They tell there mom's everything. So if your guy has told his mom that he wants to marry you, he's definitely serious!--- However...guys.. tend to be very egotistic, meaning they think they are the providers, they have to make sure they have money in order to have a family or even take the responsibility of someone else. This means you. I understand you been together for 2 years now. Guys can't commit until they are positive they can take care of you and be settled at the same time.
Another reason why he may be acting like this is because, it may be overwhelming for him about this idea of marriage. Sure he brought it up but sometimes, when they think "... wait a minute this is really happening.." they sort of panic like cold feet for girls. So it's just a matter of time and he's only acting like that because he doesn't want to get too serious about marriage too fast.
But he still has it on his mind! so don't worry, give it some time and be very supportive and understanding, even though it can be really hard just waiting for an answer or if your like me--- going nuts about the situation at hand!=)
I hope this helps.. don't be confused, just relax and take this day by day. And trust him when he say's not now... and he's only acting like this because he may really be overwhelmed by school, family, or not having to see you as often maybe.-
-- Sapna
Terrorists set off more than seven bombs in the city of Jaipur, in Western India, killing 80 people and leaving over 150 injured. Five explosions took place at crowded markets in Jaipur and one in old Jaipur in the State of Rajasthan, a region famous for its many Palaces and ancient cities, which draws hundreds of thousands of tourists every year.
The blasts occurred near the Hanuman Temple in Tripolia Bazaar, where large number of people had gathered, as well as Johari Bazaar, Manas Chowk, Badi Choupal, Chhoti Choupal and at Lakshmi Mishthan Bhandar in old Jaipur. "The blasts were coordinated and were 'obviously a terror attack," says Rajasthan Director General of Police A. S. Gill. Police sources say the attack was meticulously planned and the first blast occurred around 7.40 PM and other blasts were set off in quick succession.
Sources say bombs blasts happened in the time span of ten minutes, one taking place in a car. Rapid Action Force (RAF) personnel were also in Jaipur to deal with the situation as security was strengthened quickly after the incident. The temples were chosen because Tuesdays is a special day for Hanuman worshipers, and the explosions would have the maximum impact. According to police the bombs were carried on bicycles — perhaps cars — to the destinations before being exploded. The injured were rushed to Sawai Man Singh hospital, city's main hospital. Prime Minister Manmohan Singh and President Pratibha Patil condemned the blasts and offered assurance for the people of Jaipur.
Historic Jaipur has a population of more than two million, and is one of India's top tourist resorts and a favourite attraction for foreigners. Jaipur is popularly known as the 'pink city' because of the ochre-pink hue of its old palaces, buildings and city walls.
Arya Samaj Mandir in Markham, in Association with Kamlesh Oberoi, member of board of directors of AWIC Community and Social Services celebrated Mother's Day on Sunday. This event is held every year on Mothers Day, with the help of Sunday school kids from Vedic Cultural Centre. Families from, as far as, Hamilton in the west, and Oshawa in the east, come to enjoy performances from kids, mothers and even father’s. At the end of the event, kids though tired, were thankful to parents for being there and supporting them through thick and thin.
Mother's Day is celebrated across the World, where children honor and appreciate their mothers with gifts and greetings.The roots of this tradition originate from a customary worship of Cybele, a great mother of Greek gods in Ancient Greece. In most countries Mothers day is celebrated on May 11th, where as in some other countries, it is celebrated on May 8th.
Mongolian moms must really be lucky because it’s the only country, where Mother’s day is celebrated twice a year.
Can you honestly tell me, if you passed by a penny on the
floor, you wouldn't pick it up? Not even for good luck? Lately, there's all this penny talk. Well guess what! We might not have the penny
anymore! ---I hope you weren't saving up pennies in a jar-----
A majority of Canadian are favoring in punting the penny.
Recently Canada's Coinage system have been discussing and suggesting that
the penny should be removed immediately! And eventually removing five-cent and 25-cent
coins. They want to introduce a new 20-cent piece. ---- "Believe me I'm not kidding." The polls showed 56 percent of Canadians supporting to
abandon the use of pennies, while 44 percent opposed. Fact: 53 percent of Ontarians wanted
to eliminate the one-cent coin. Some people worry------If we eliminate the penny, five-cent coin and 25-cent coins,
this may cause prices to go up--- which means more TAXES. A Desjardins study says removing the penny, and the nickel,
simply would lead to rounding up or down to the nearest 10 cents, as is done in
New Zealand. --- Do you think we should abolish the penny? ---
As far as I know, everyone loves pets---
Did you know that owning a pet could help you live longer?
More than 60 percent of Canadian households include pets, and those pet owners pour $41 billion a year into pet care.
I know what you’re thinking.... that's a lot of money. But when you consider the fact that owning a pet could very likely add years to your life it quickly seems like a wise investment.
According to a study by the Minnesota Stroke Institute that followed more than 4,000 cat owners over 10 years, resulted that owning a cat can dramatically reduce a person's chance of dying heart disease.
Let's get more specific:
People who owned cats were 30 percent less likely to suffer a heart attack. Although the study can't make the same conclusion about dogs but they provide similar results.
And let's not forget the benefits for the elderly. For example, one study observed neural activity in seniors while they walked or interacted with a dog. It showed that walking with a dog gave seniors a boost in parasympathetic nervous system activity. In simple terms, it's good because their nervous system helps calm and rest the body.
Other studies conclude that children with dogs cope better with serious situations.
It's sort of obvious: pets provide love and taking taking care of a pet is positive for the child.
That's not the only benefit!
You'll be amazed to hear that certain dogs can predict when their owner is about to suffer an epileptic seizure. Some dogs end up developing a mysterious ability to warn the owner before he or she suffers a seizure.
According to the Canine Assistants, they claim that most dogs develop prediction abilities within a year of being with their owner.
There are many more reason's to have a pet but for whatever reason, pets certainly can have a special effect on their owners.
Questions? ----Give me a shout! Let me know if you’re about to invest in a pet.
--I couldn't stay away--Recently I just bough a puppy, wait for some pictures.
Survey Source:
American Pet Products Manufacturers Association and CBC News
On March 29, 2008 at 8 p.m., join millions of people around the world in making a statement about climate change by turning off the lights for Earth Hour. An event which was created by the World Wildlife Fund.
In one year the event has grown from one city to a global movement.
In 2008, millions of people, businesses, governments and civic organizations in nearly 200 cities around the globe will turn out for Earth Hour.
More than 100 cities across North America will participate, including the US flagships–Atlanta, Chicago, Phoenix and San Francisco and Ottawa, Montreal, Toronto and Vancouver
Turn off your lights, and make a difference.
Originally, the rule was more along the lines of "Only wear white shoes between Memorial Day and Labor Day." It mainly applied to white pumps or dress shoes. .... which is RIDICULOUS!
The only logical reasoning for this theory you make ask?
An Image consultant Nancy Penn explains:
White reflects light and heat, wearing white would make you cooler in winter, and thus should be avoided. But others suggest the rule stems from a class issue.
You may be SURPRISED:
It also has to do with class. In the early part of last century, a lot of people started making the jump from middle to upper class. The rule came about to help these "nouveau-riche" people understand high society fashion, which they didn't have a natural affinity for.
Are you still wearing white...?
Hey Terry! Agree with you! I don't know what they were made for but I do like the style, but... read more
on Spring 2008: Wearing a Gladi who?